I Should Google That

Ughhhh, I just stepped in a puddle. Suckkkkk. I’m trying to curb the amount of times I say Fuuu…you get my point. I probably say it the same amount, or more, as I say the word AND. I grew up in the northeast and cursing is pretty much ingrained in us. Anyway, not the point. I stepped in this huge sucking puddle. I have no idea how I missed it. It’s like I missed walking straight into the Mississippi River. My head has been in the clouds and my thumb up my ass. Oh, ass is not a curse word technically as it is a body part. No, it’s not technically called an anus…now you have me Googling technical terms for rear end and buttocks versus anus. According to el Google, the buttocks are the fat surrounding hole and the anus is the hole. So the technical term for ass is buttocks, unless you are talking about the asshole and then that technically would be the anus. And technically the nipple is the thelium. Yeah, I am definitely not going to remember these terms tomorrow or in an hour for that matter. Probably the reason I am not a doctor and keep saying ‘technically’ instead of ‘medical term’. I did spend 7 years in college, so I could have been a doctor. If I didn’t switch my major between horticulture, latin, anthropology, and art history. I Googled the dumbest major and the first on the list was horticulture. Wish I didn’t spend 5 out of the 7 years on that major. I do have a dozen killer patio plants that would make Martha Stewart jealous. Does she even have a green thumb or is cooking solely her thing? She is the only person I know who could bounce back stronger after prison. Maybe I should go to prison. I should Google that process.